What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
