a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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