ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Two words: blizzard sex
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize