He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize