I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
