Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
