she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Sext me about skeletons
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
