You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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