I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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