If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
