let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
