but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
