did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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