Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
