look no pants
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Randomize
