There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
