Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Randomize
