idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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