Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
