he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
