...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
