did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
now i know why i became what i already was.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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