im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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