and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
