the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
not ubering you a puppy
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
The ass gains better be worth it
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