Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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