Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize