Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
