There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Randomize
