just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
