Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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