at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You dont lie about slip and slides
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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