Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
People in love make me want to vomit
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
