is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
he puts the penis in happiness.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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