Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
you never un-have a 4some
You were trust falling into bushes
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
