brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
