I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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