awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
