I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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