Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
