Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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