There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
