he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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