69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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