i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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