drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
