I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
