idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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