oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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