there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I'm bleeding and have questions
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
