So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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